Anal Sex

Hi!! Its the weekend, so I thought I would cover something different today - ANAL SEX

Learn the dangers of anal sex, as well as the benefits of it. There are some very valid reasons why you should and shouldn't do anal. This comprehensive list will help you to decide if anal penetration is right for you.
So why would anyone want to have anal sex? For one thing, the anus is a highly erotic area, with tons of nerve endings. These nerve endings, when stimulated the right way, can cause very pleasureable feelings.
Another reason to have anal sex (at least for gay men) is because of anatomy. There is no vagina to have regular vaginal sex with, so the standard is anal sex.
Men also tend to like it because of the very tight feeling of an anus hugging their penis. Such a tight squeeze on their penis produces a wonderful feeling, that they just can't experience with a vagina.

The main reason someone will not be into anal sex is PAIN! Lets face it, the anus was designed as a one-way street. Nothing is really supposed to go up there. However, with time and experience the pain factor will subside, and the receiving partner will get used to it.

As with all sexual activities - please, please protect yourself.....this area is filled with bacteria that you do not want to be spread around. This is one of the main dangers of anal sex. If engaging in anal, do it safely.

Anal penetration can be a very exciting, pleasureable, and intimate act between two people who care about each other, but only if both partners agree that they really want it.
Communicating openly with your partner is the key. If one partner has a problem with anal that they just can't get over, don't push the issue anymore. Respect your partner's feelings, even if it means you'll never get to experience anal sex.

The Lusty Frog Sex Position!

How to do todays sex position - the lusty frog!!

Straddle your man (lying on his back) and slowly lower yourself onto his pelvis, sliding his penis inside you as you go. But rather than sitting down in a straddle position, raise yourself up off him in a squatting position. Put your hands on his thighs, stomach, rib cage or upper chest for support. Start by sliding yourself up and down his penis by lifting your lower body up and down — a totally different motion than going forward and back like normal woman-on-top. Vary your pace, starting with some fast, teasingly shallow thrusts that touch only the tip of his penis, then move down into deep, slower thrusts that envelop him completely. The fabulous friction you'll create will give you the double bonus of amazing sensations all along the edge of your vaginal opening when you pump shallow and on your G-spot when you pump deep. And if you try leaning backward and resting your hands on his thighs and knees, the sensation will even spread to your clitoris — and the natural arching of your back will open up your body for him to fondle.

4 somes - a good idea?

Okay, so here is todays sex query from a REAL client - we shall call them KS

Hi. A friend of ours was telling us how much she wanted a 3some. Her bf also did but obviously both of them wanted the extra person to be the opposite sex. Next day after being involved in the arguement we shared the same views and thought everyone would be happy if we just had a 4some. We shared the idea and everyone was up for it except our friend who's gone off it and won't say why. She cant be nervous about being naked round us as we always call in on her in birthday suit. So my question is why has she changed her mind and gone against the idea of ever having 3 some or more and is there a chance we including her bf can help reverse her mind? thanks

Dear KS,

Thanks for your enquiry!!

It sounds to me like you friend has a serious case of cold feet!! Whilst the idea of her having a 3 some, with her BF and another bloke sounded attractive to her - apparently the idea of having a 3 some with her BF and another lady didnt!!

For this very same reason, I dont think that she is going to be up for having a 4some either - this isn't anything to do with her shyness over being naked in front of you (she has already proved she is OK with that!), I believe that it is more to do with her BF being "involved" in the act with another woman.

I really can't see her changing her mind on this, to be honest, ESPECIALLY if you are planning on including the BF - I think her reluctance to see him with someone else is the reason for the "cold feet". Its probably for the best if you and your partner seek a 4some with another couple, where BOTH of them are open to the suggestion.

Good luck and please dont hesitate to get back in touch if you need any further help.

Kind regards,

Katy

M has high sex drive -is that normal?

Interesting blog you have you certainly seem to know your stuff, how does someone come to have so much knowledge? it has taken me years of being a sex addict to learn some of the tricks and tips that you share, (now every man will know my secret)so maybe you can help me though?why do i want sex with loads of different women all of the time?that is the only question i want answering?m x

Dear M

Thanks for your input!! I have written sex advice for years and studied psychology so I have learnt a few things along the way....apart from all that though, since I was young I have been fascinated with sex and all the variables and forms that it takes........so I guess my hobby has literally turned into my passion!!

As for your question...... you arent alone, many, many men feel the need to have sex with different women all the time.........men are hardwired differently from women - women need to be loved and nurtured, to have the emotional side of their well being taken care of, whilst men are typically more concerned with procreation and (to put it bluntly!)"getting their rocks off". You guys are very physical creatures (thats not to say some of us women arent too!) and this is how you find release. Are you in a relationship at the moment? Do you find it hard to stay faithful to one person - those are questions that need answering more than the one you have asked! If you are not in a relationship and you stay faithful when you are, then I dont really see that you have a problem - as long, of course, as you USE A CONDOM and stay safe!

Kind regards,

Katy

Snooker wants NSA - my advice.....

Thanks for the reply I am sure I can work this out but meantime do you see any problems if I have NSA sex???

Dear Snooker

If you partner consents to this, then no, not a problem - BUT if you go behind her back, you will end up feeling even more guilty - and you are risking your relationship....is it worth it??

Advice for Snooker

Hi there

I am a mid 50s guy with a lovely partner who is tired most of the time and not really interested in sex most of the time. We have been together for 16 years now and I am worried that I am becoming a sex addict and have been worried about this for a while and spend a lot of time of dodgy websites. How can I control myself?



Hi Snooker



Thank you for contacting me!



I guess the first thing I want to say (and this might sound obvious!) is have you spoken to your partner about her reduced sex drive? This could be caused by a myriad of things - anything from stress, to depression, or even the menopause.....try to get to the root of the problem with her.



I assume when you say "dodgy websites", you mean porn sites? Well, this is perfectly normal for many men - does your partner look at these sites with you, or is it something you do on your own, without her knowledge ( in which case, it it guilt that is making you worried?) How much time are you spending on these sites? Is it an hour a day (which is perfectly fine) - or is it starting to consume all your spare time?

I do feel from your email that you are worrying more than necessary - if you have a higher sex drive than you partner, then it is obvious that you are going to think about sex more than you might normally as your needs are not being met at the moment.

Have you tried giving her a cuddle and not pressuring her for more - just letting her know that you love her and making her feel wanted without the sex part - often when one partner wants sex and the other doesnt, it can lead to a vicious circle - man wants sex=woman doesnt=man asks for more sex=women feels pressured=woman wants even less sex!!

Please speak to your partner about your worries - communication is always the key!

If you need to talk some more, then please do not hesitate to contact me.....

All the best

Katy

Sex tip - and changes!!

Hi peeps - have been a bit quiet today - been doing a photo shoot for my new column - i'll let you read all about that later....!! In the meantime - here is my sex tip of the a day..and a little announcement - I have been so busy with my new column that I am going to publish some of the questions I receive on here - dont worry -as ever its always COMPLETELY confidential, but from tomorrow, you can see some real-life problems that people have been having and my suggestions to help them overcome them - as you all know by now, im not shy and im only too willing to help-as ever get in touch hotwet666@hotmail.com if you want some free advice and in the meantime - enjoy my sex tip (why not put it into practice tonight!!!)

Bye for now bb's

HOT SEX TIP
The Backstairs Boogie -- Kneel in front of your partner at the landing of a staircase, both of you facing the stairs, your bodies meshed tightly. While you reach up and hold on to each side of the staircase for support (or to the stairs themselves), he holds your hips and penetrates you from behind.

Sunday Sex - Slow and Sensuous!

How to do it! - You: lying on your back with legs outstretched and slightly open. Put a pillow under your bottom to make access easier and to allow deeper penetration .With your lover as if he was about to do press-ups over you, he supports himself on his arms and puts one hand on each side of your face. With your hands on his bum, encourage him to make figures of eight inside you.This is great, because this angle of penetration enables your partner's penis to go very deep but it's the figure-of-eight movement that allows him to reach and stimulate your deepest, untouched parts. An added bonus is his penis rubbing against your clit, which is always explosive! Get him to do variations on a figure-of-eight to give you different sensations.