Its a BIG sex chat today, my darlings - it covers a lot, but its important to talk about.....MASTURBATION

Experts say that just about every man who can masturbate does -and theres no reason why not! You don't need an expert to tell you that solo sex feels good, relieves stress, and is a great sleep aid. But here are five things you may not know about your hand job...

1. There's no such thing as "abnormal" masturbation.
Men often wonder if there's something abnormal about the way they masturbate. But experts point out that men show great variations in both frequency and technique.

2. Masturbation is very safe -- but not entirely safe.
Unlike sex with a partner, masturbation can't give you a sexually transmitted disease. Nor will it subject you to the muscle strains, pokes in the eye, and awkward moments that can come with partner sex. But masturbation safety isn't guaranteed. Frequent or overly vigorous masturbation can irritate the skin of the penis, and less well known is that habitually masturbating face down -- for example, by thrusting against a sheet, pillow, or even a carpeted floor -- can injure the urethra in such a way that urine exits the penis not in a stream but in a hard-to-control spray. (OUCH!!) In certain extremely rare instances, masturbation and partner sex alike can cause penile fracture if done roughly - this is a medical emergency, and it often necessitates surgery.

3. Solo sex can supercharge your sex life -- or scuttle it.
For various reasons, solo sex can be a real boon to sex with a partner. It helps teach men about their own sexual response -- what feels good to them and what doesn't -- so they will be better able to explain to their partners just how they like to be touched. It helps men learn to recognize the "moment of inevitability" just before orgasm and helps teach them how to avoid premature ejaculation. It's also a great coping mechanism for any man whose partner is unavailable for sex -- because of absence or illness -- or has a sex drive that doesn't quite match his own
However, some men become so obsessed with solo sex that they begin to lose interest in having sex with their partner. But experts are quick to point out that masturbation is perfectly OK even for men in a committed relationship. We cant assume that just because a man masturbates that there is a problem with his primary relationship.

4. Certain forms of masturbation can lead to sexual dysfunction.
Experts warn that men who frequently stimulate themselves in ways that don't simulate sex with a partner -- for example, stroking very rapidly or with great pressure or friction -- can develop retarded ejaculation. That's a type of sexual dysfunction in which it is difficult or even impossible to climax during partnered sex.

5. Masturbation may affect the risk for prostate cancer.
The relationship between masturbation and prostate cancer is a bit hazy.
A 2003 Australian study published in BJU International linked frequent ejaculation early in life with reduced risk for prostate cancer later on. But in a 2004 study published in The Journal of the American Medical Association, a researcher reported that "ejaculation frequency is not related to increased risk of prostate cancer." In both these studies, ejaculation frequency included sexual intercourse and masturbation.
In a study published this past January in BJU International, researchers found that frequent masturbation in young men raised the risk for prostate cancer but that frequent masturbation in older men lowered the risk. Sexual intercourse did not affect prostate cancer risk.
The researchers theorize that it may not be the masturbation itself which is increasing risk of prostate cancer in men who masturbate frequently in their 20s and 30s. Men who masturbate more may do so because they have high levels of male sex hormones -- and young men genetically predisposed to have hormone-sensitive prostate cancer will be at higher risk if they have more male hormones. In men over age 50, the researchers theorize, frequent masturbation helps drain the prostate of fluids that may contain cancer-causing substances.

PHEW - well done for hanging in there........as ever, if you have any comments, questions or a problem you need a hand with (NOT literally, lads!) then please email me - hotwet666@hotmail.com. Have a good one ;0)

Snooker wants NSA - my advice.....

Thanks for the reply I am sure I can work this out but meantime do you see any problems if I have NSA sex???

Dear Snooker

If you partner consents to this, then no, not a problem - BUT if you go behind her back, you will end up feeling even more guilty - and you are risking your relationship....is it worth it??

Advice for Snooker

Hi there

I am a mid 50s guy with a lovely partner who is tired most of the time and not really interested in sex most of the time. We have been together for 16 years now and I am worried that I am becoming a sex addict and have been worried about this for a while and spend a lot of time of dodgy websites. How can I control myself?



Hi Snooker



Thank you for contacting me!



I guess the first thing I want to say (and this might sound obvious!) is have you spoken to your partner about her reduced sex drive? This could be caused by a myriad of things - anything from stress, to depression, or even the menopause.....try to get to the root of the problem with her.



I assume when you say "dodgy websites", you mean porn sites? Well, this is perfectly normal for many men - does your partner look at these sites with you, or is it something you do on your own, without her knowledge ( in which case, it it guilt that is making you worried?) How much time are you spending on these sites? Is it an hour a day (which is perfectly fine) - or is it starting to consume all your spare time?

I do feel from your email that you are worrying more than necessary - if you have a higher sex drive than you partner, then it is obvious that you are going to think about sex more than you might normally as your needs are not being met at the moment.

Have you tried giving her a cuddle and not pressuring her for more - just letting her know that you love her and making her feel wanted without the sex part - often when one partner wants sex and the other doesnt, it can lead to a vicious circle - man wants sex=woman doesnt=man asks for more sex=women feels pressured=woman wants even less sex!!

Please speak to your partner about your worries - communication is always the key!

If you need to talk some more, then please do not hesitate to contact me.....

All the best

Katy

Its not the size of your penis.....its what you do with it....

I know that many of you guys worry about the size of your penis - although, in my experience, having a big cock doesnt necessarily make you the best lover.......but still, for those that need some help getting over this emotionally, heres my info on making your cock larger......

Stretching is probably the best known penis enlargement method, and has bee n the most commonly used over time. Grasping the base of your penis and then gently force the hand towards the head of the penis, causing the whole member to swell under the increased blood pressure. The penis should never be fully erect (this is NOT masturbation) - it must be partially flaccid in order for the tissue to stretch.
A common regime might involve stretching only 20 – 30 minutes per day, two or three days in a row, with a rest day taken before starting again. Over-rubbing can result in soreness, and excessive abrasion in the shedding of skin from the penis; these conditions can be alleviated by using a lubricant during sessions. If bruising occurs, take a couple of days off, and wait until the penis fully heals before continuing.